TwoMonths

Its been so long since I posted again . And you probably guessed it right . I'm here to rant my whole entire life .

Everything have been good . No matter how bad school is . It still beats staying home . I doubt I'll ever be happy here again . Honestly . Sometimes I just wanna run away and deny that fact that I am useless . I wanna prove it to everyone . But life sucks . I'm useless like this . I'll never excel . I'll never be better than anyone . Not even myself .

As the clock ticks , you find yourself reminiscing about the past . The times when you were well like by everyone cause you're a kid . You had no worries . You had nothing to bother about . And luck , as well , were never an issue to you .

But I was cursed . You set the curse on me . I used to think my luck will get better . Maybe not anymore , cause you finally let the cat out of the bag . You set this curse upon me . You set a curse on your own blood . Me . Does it even make any sense ?

They say I could count on you for everything . But what should I do when you set a curse on me . Who should I trust anymore ? I lived life in darkness and fear for years . And the thoughts of wanting to be the best held me through it all . The only motivation I had in my whole life .

You laid your fingers on me many times thinking I've gone bad . But never once did you ever think how much I did . Just wanting to make you proud . None . You probably won't know how much it hurts ..

꿋꿋

Party in the east

Finally , a chalet after so long . Something I've been looking forward to with the boys . And tadaaaa . Chalet was booked on Saturday . And commenced 2 days back . Let's go back in time .

15apr.
Met shaun @ srg to purchase booze then bussing down to to meet bby , hanwei and junjie . They went to eat while I collected my card and checked in . Waited for qiang before heading into the chalet . Did some nuaing and card gaming before jet, huaxuan and Angelique arrive . Head off for dinner at just acia and we all felt like dying . Honestly . Sucky food :( jet hx hw bought kfc while jj went home . Back to chalet for card gaming and drinking . Jet left shortly . Drinking game was damn funny . 7 of us finish a bottle of tequila and vodka . And they were all reminiscing about their secondary school time . Kekekek . Should have more but oh well . Lepak awhile before I knocked out at 3odd beside bby .

16apr.
Woke up at 7 odd . Breakfast @ toastbox at around 11odd 12 . Qiang went hone after That , while we head off to the polyclinic . Back at chalet @ 4 . Bathed (like finally ! Hahahahah) cards again before me bby and qiang went to purchase dinner . Back to chalet to eat and the crazy game of twister started . That's seriously damn dope . Back to card games . Monopoly deal for hours with weird rules with the boys . Can't imagine how they spend their time in secondary :3 knocked out at 3odd .

17apr.
Woke up to my phone alarm at 6odd , witnessing the super awesome thunderstorm . But it was damn cold . Omggg . Checked out at 9 odd . Dapao subz with bby before cabbing home .

It seriously feels like im overseas while playing monopoly deal inside at midnight . Hahaha !
I met new friends . And have so much fun . Thank you :)

일이 같은 예상 못했던 일

It's been long since I came back to blogging . Procrastination took me away for a vacation on my bed . HAHAHAH ! Yea , I'm just too lazy ~~~

Went for Joey's belated birthday celebration on Friday . Met around noon on train . Whoop ! And happy me finally get to swim ^^ and drink and meet joey ^^ kekeke !

Went for mi ahyi's wedding on Sunday ~ in my very awkward long dress . But I'm happy I get to wear dresses and heels ^^ but the thoughts of having to make up dredddddd alot .





9 years back I was in primary four . I was in my newly renovated school , passing notes with Janet . I remembered . We were talking about spirits instead or paying attention in class . And suddenly she told me to draw . But I'm never good at drawing so she wrote back to 'anyhow draw' and I did . I randomly sketched and the outcome was so pretty . It was 2 round fat chick . Probably the best drawing i did . I was feeling sad cause I have to leave the school soon and I was arranged into a group I whom I knew none . I was lost . Hence I drew 2 chick , for one was looking back .
I handed her the drawing . Instead of interpreting my sadness , she said '不要做朋友就讲，不用画到这样！' she was English educated . I knew then she was really mad . I apologised . But still she choose to ignore me .

9 years later I , still have no luck .

Idk if you'll read this . I'm sorry . I figured out the surface . I don't need them , all I need was you . You probably won't forgive me so soon . But I'll wait . Idk what else to say except sorry . I cherish this friendship alot . I don't mean to take anything or anyone away ...

Xoxo